Frankly, He Was a Great Guy

I was 27 when I met Republican Leader, Assemblyman Alex DeCroce.   Just a kiddo, in his vernacular.  He chaired my first legislative committee assignment in the General Assembly.  I cut my political teeth in Assemblyman DeCroce’s Committee.  I learned a lot about the process under his leadership but more importantly I learned a lot about the quality of the man and the value of his word under his friendship.

As with any effective legislator, he was  savvy, disciplined, conscientious and efficient.  He expected as much from everyone he dealt with, staff included.  As a politician, Assemblyman DeCroce knew the game well.  He understood the necessity at times for partisanship but beyond that as a public servant he instinctively sought solutions.  He knew the value of compromise and encouraged discussion from both sides of the aisle.  No bill was released from his committee half-done for the sake of a press release.  He wasn’t signing off on anything that wasn’t the best working product and had the consensus of all involved.  Substance was always more important than style and he never clamored for the credit or headlines. He just sought what was best for the state.

It was that manner in which he conducted business that revealed the dedication and humility of Alex and showed me that he was politician only when necessary but a gentleman always. 

Almost immediately I felt familiarity with the Assemblyman.  Both of us were born and raised in Morris County albeit the Morris County I grew up in was largely built by him. Both of us shared Italian heritage and working class roots. But what really struck me about Alex DeCroce was how strongly his personality matched that of my father.  It was the era in which they came of age that gave them both a quiet sense of duty and commitment, a respect for the rules and civility, and an appreciation for loyalty, and a great sense of humor.   

Generosity is another shared quality of the two men.  My father is always generous with his time and when able his resources.  Alex always had a moment to share with anyone who sought it.  From a staffer’s perspective, he was tremendously generous with his own personal resources to make sure those loyal to him always felt welcome (and well fed),  were treated with respect, and recognized for their efforts.  He strived  not only to maintain a staff that worked well together but to foster an almost familial congeniality among us.  His paternal influence in the office motivated all of us to excel  not merely to advance a political position but  because we knew it pleased him to see us do so. 

I found working with the Assemblyman to be a hardly working at all.  So much so that I always felt at home in his office, free to speak informally, free to offer honest assessments.  I understood his thought process and I knew where he would come down on an issue with little need for discussion.  I also recognized that Alex had heartfelt conviction which at times would need some pause if it were to be understood properly as insight and not mere opinion. 

Like anyone’s father, Alex spoke with sincerity and compassion shrouded in frankness.  At times he offered a necessary but bitter pill of constructive criticism.  Nothing was ever sugar coated and occasionally what first came to mind is what came out of his mouth but it was always delivered with the best of intentions.  He was never spiteful or mean-spirited.  There was no maliciousness in his message.

Alex was not an elequent orator (although there was often  eloquence to be found in the simplicity of his wisdom). He communicated with the plainspoken language of a bygone era where words were not artificially defined with political implications and turns-of-phrase weren’t entangled with potential liabilities.  What Alex lacked in finesse he more than made up for in honesty and forthrightness. He spoke from the heart not from well-tested talking points and speaking from the heart at times leaves you open to criticism, justified or not.  He spoke just like your father and family speak around the dinner table.

Staff tried often to have him work off of prepared remarks and Alex tried as best he could to read from his script.  But you always knew when Alex was off script.  When he went off script is when you heard passion in his voice and conviction in his tone.  When Alex was off script, there was a lesson to learn, a point to be made, and wisdom to be imparted.  He spoke from experience on the issues and not from knowledge - the latter being gleaned from pages of research prepared for you but lacking the dirt under the nails authenticity only experience can bring.

Those who took the time to listen recognized all of this in Assemblyman DeCroce and respected him for that. Those who didn't listen lost out on the wisdom of Alex DeCroce.  Then again, as the saying goes, you cannot impart wisdom as it is always taken as foolishness.  It is much like your father's comments in the midst of a daunting task.  If only you take pause you will respect and appreciate the advice of your father; realizing he knows what he is talking about not because he read the instructions but because long ago he rolled his sleeves up, got his hands dirty and did it already.